Monday, September 12, 2005

Note: Need for Groundedness

I'm alive and I still love it here.

I'm feeling so incredibly uncentered and ungrounded. I feel cluttered, but I can't figure out why - I have so much space in my schedule right now. I just went out to sit by the lake in a spot near my dorm that seems rather private; I thought maybe I could just sit and gather my thoughts and really relax for a little while. Once I sat down I was acutely aware of a couple giant clouds of mosquitoes hovering in the air around and above me. I knew this would happen, and when I left to go to that spot I had decided to ignore them and deal with it. Mosquitoes weren't going to stop me from taking my break. But then I also heard voices nearby - someone must have been a little ways away either in a boat or further down the coast of the lake. I didn't particularly want people to know I was there - I thought this was a private space. Anywho, the point here is that I couldn't relax. When I lay back I felt tense-ness; a tense-ness from far more than just mosquitoes and the possibility of people near by. I think it goes back to feeling cluttered.

I know the Spirit is with me, I just need to figure out how to get back in touch. I feel the effects of my need for groundedness.

Time will help. I just needed to get this out there.

Love and Light,
Claire

4 Comments:

Anonymous Cathy said...

I know what you are going through. I use have the problem when I use to go to the lake to write. You will learn to tune them out. Best bet is just to take a deep breath and just let the mind wander. Find a rock on the ground and focus on it. Sometime that allows you to tune out the world. But then again, sometime I wonder if the distaction are there to remeind us of something else. Hopefully the next time you there, you'll better luck

12/9/05 8:31 PM  
Blogger Danny said...

hi claire

it's good to hear you're still loving school. :-) last year i noticed that for myself centeredness didn't have much to do with the fullness of my schedule. when i had lots of free time, i could easily spend it drowning in spiritual confusion, or whatever. this may or may not shed any light on your experience. i just thought i'd toss mine in there.

13/9/05 8:34 PM  
Blogger Liz Opp said...

I wonder if Spirit is trying to break through because of your "space in your schedule." I know some of what you left behind at home, unfinished, and I wonder if something within you is asking for attention and care.

One technique I've used, when I haven't been able to quiet myself and reground, is to yield to the UNgroundedness, to imagine a life of even greater chaos...

But you didn't ask for tips, and I hear that it is disconcerting to you, to feel so uncentered and disconnected from Spirit, despite loving where you are now, physically.

Private space is so important, inn't?

Thanks for "getting this out there." Truly.

Blessings,
Liz, The Good Raised Up

14/9/05 8:10 PM  
Blogger Contemplative Scholar said...

In one of the courses I teach (with another professor who is very spiritually grounded) we have the students go on a meditation walk once a week and journal about it. This is one of the ongoing assignments in the course. The walk takes about 50 minutes, and the route, which is the same every week, wanders through the woods along a river, then comes into town, and then back through campus.

The idea is that students can find it hard to make time and space for themselves. So we make it a course requirement to help them give themselves permission to do this! Many students are very grateful for this innovative kind of "assignment"! They are often astonished at how helpful it turns out to be, in ways they didn't expect.

Repeating the same route helps ground them, and helps them connect to Place in a really powerful way. The repetition (not really repetitious, because everything along the route changes with the change of seasons) is also spiritually significant in helping them to mark personal growth.

I am doing the walks myself, and journalling about them too.

Maybe something like this (or some other personally meaningful regular spiritual discipline) would be helpful to you!

Just a friendly suggestion!

15/9/05 11:18 PM  

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